Keeping You

Lifestyle: Back to school, but no-one to hang out with

07 Feb 2019

Frances (10) is back-to-school but at a totally new school, Balmacewen Intermediate, where she knows no-one. Mum and Dad are finding it hard.

My older sister, Robyn, ran the boarding department at St Matthews Collegiate School for girls in Masterton and she was the one to turn to for advice. “If you want a friend, be a friend,” was Robyn’s advice to all the new 12-year old girls at the start of the year, many of them from Asia in New Zealand for the first time.

Frances is putting her advice into practice. Mum and Dad are hanging out to dry.

We are feeling guilty because we could have sent Frances to the local intermediate where all her friends were going. And she is such a social individual, like all her 10 and 11-year old friends. Friends are very important to her and she has a great bunch of them, only they all go to a different school now. What have we done? We are feeling guilty.

I guess we thought it would be easy and it is not easy. It is hard.

Frances’ teacher assures us that it will be fine, eventually. It just takes time.


So, for all those children out there going to a new school for the first time and unsure about who will be their friend, I for one am feeling for you.

“If you want a friend, be a friend.”

That should be easy. Perhaps not so easy for a 10-year old?

Keep asking great questions …


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